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Fellows Blog Series

Learning About Myself and Coming Into My Own

Headshot of Lily in professional dress in front of RespectAbility banner

Lily

Growing up, I never knew that being gay was an option. Sure, I would see the occasional couple in public, or overhear something on the radio, but I knew who I was. I was a girl, and girls liked boys. I was naturally drawn to women. All my idols were high achieving girls, and I had intensely personal friendships with girls my age. Looking back, this early conflict between my concept of what I should be, and the person I was rapidly becoming was surely a major aspect of the mental health struggles I would come to face as I grew older. [continue reading…]

At the Intersection of Deafness, Queerness and Being an Asian-American Woman

Headshot of Kaity in a suit in front of the Respectability banner

Kaity

Hello, my name is Kaity, I am Asian-American, and I identify as pansexual and demisexual. Pansexual refers to someone who is attracted to all genders beyond the binary male and female genders, including genderfluid and transgender individuals. Demisexual refers to someone who does not feel a sexual attraction unless an emotional connection is established first. I also am profoundly Deaf in both ears and have cochlear implants.

I came out in November of 2016 a day after President Donald Trump was elected. I posted on Facebook saying that I was bisexual. Bisexual refers to one that is attracted to men and women only. I used the term bisexual because I knew that most of my friends and family would not know what pansexual was. My friends and extended family responded in a positive and supportive manner. My parents already knew I was pansexual. [continue reading…]

Gay and on the Autism Spectrum: My Experience Growing Up in the Closet

Eric Ascher headshot against RespectAbility banner

Eric Ascher

Early in the eighth grade, one of my friends posted a video on Facebook using the webcam on his computer and lots of visual effects as a fun waste of time. I decided to steal his idea, making a silly little video that I intended for just my friends to see. This one decision to make and upload a video changed everything.

I did not have the right privacy settings turned on, so anyone could view my profile if they wanted to. Naturally, two of the school bullies found the video, downloaded it and re-uploaded it to YouTube with the comments section turned on. One person wrote “Eric is a r***rd that goes to my school.” As someone who is on the autism spectrum, that really hurt. Other people would walk up to me in the hallway, quoting lines from the video and would just laugh at me. It was horrible, and while I do not think about the situation anymore, I could not stop thinking about it for a long time. This was just one incident in a long personal history of being marginalized and bullied. [continue reading…]

Steve Bartlett: Learning to Play on the Field

Steve Bartlett with RespectAbility staff and Fellows

Steve Bartlett with RespectAbility staff and Fellows

Rockville, Maryland, June 14, 2018 – During the Fellows Speakers Series, RespectAbility’s National Leadership Program Fellows had the opportunity to speak with former Texas Congressman and former mayor of Dallas, Steve Bartlett. He was truly inspirational to listen to because his experience advocating for people with disabilities is extensive. Bartlett served as a principal author of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) and worked on the President’s Commission on Excellence in Special Education, and the Select Education Subcommittee.

Bartlett brought a unique Bring Your Own Agenda (BYOA) style to this session. Fellows and staff had the chance to ask Bartlett any questions about his life or politics, or for career advice. In all his answers and advice, Bartlett emphasized the common theme of goal setting, which is having a clear vision for what you would like to achieve, then creating steps to help you get there and always be willing to change your steps along the way. [continue reading…]

Geoffrey Melada: The Importance of Storytelling

Geoffrey Melada headshot

Geoffrey Melada

Rockville, Maryland, June 7, 2018 – Geoffrey Melada, the director of communications for Hillel International, believes in the power of storytelling. So much so that he began his recent mentoring session with RespectAbility’s Fellows with a story. Melada told the story of how Sen. John McCain and his fellow prisoners of war used a “tap code” system to communicate with each other while held captive in the “Hanoi Hilton” during the Vietnam War. Why didn’t years of confinement break McCain? Communication. The ability to share their stories and emotions kept McCain and his fellow American POWs sane. “Their tap code,” said Melada, “was the key to their resilience.”

Melada went on to explain that storytelling is key to fundraising, a high priority in the nonprofit sector. He conceded that most organizations recognize by now that telling stories is important for “fundraising and friend-raising,” but don’t necessarily know where to start. This is where a good story comes in. Melada showed the fellows an Oscar-winning animated short about a baby sandpiper who must conquer its fear of the ocean to feed and encouraged the Fellows to brainstorm what made the six-minute short so compelling. Responses soon filled the board, as Fellows observed that the story contained conflict, compelling characters, creative problem solving and relationships. [continue reading…]

Individuals with Autism Overcome Challenges in the Workplace

Rockville, Maryland, May 9 – I watched Lauren struggle at work. She had poor social skills. She talked obsessively about roller coasters and her siblings’ engagements and subsequent weddings. She had trouble understanding other people’s emotions. She didn’t look at you when you spoke to her. She was very sensitive to loud noises; she had to be warned of fire drills and left the area ahead of everyone else. She had trouble expressing what she needed. She flapped her hands when she struggled to articulate what she was trying to say. Her sense of touch was poor; she couldn’t tell when clothes were damp or dry. Most distressing, she rarely received credit for her hard work; only her mistakes were recognized and never forgotten. She was treated unfairly. She was too smart for her own good. She had been a laundry aide for nine years. Lauren has Asperger’s syndrome, which is an autism spectrum disorder (ASD). She overcame adversity by trying her best and being herself.

Freddie Highmore as Dr. Shaun Murphy in a labcoat

Freddie Highmore as Dr. Shaun Murphy on ABC’s “The Good Doctor”

I thought that because I have a disability and had family members who have disabilities, that I understood all disabilities. That is not true. I did not understand why Lauren was making inappropriate comments, not listening to understand what I was trying to say and making my day harder than it needed to be sometimes. I did not know why she was behaving the way she did. I would not understand any of her behaviors until I watched ABC’s “The Good Doctor” and I saw Freddie Highmore’s Dr. Shaun Murphy behave in the same manner. [continue reading…]

Lenny Larsen: “Get out there and be the change you want to see”

Lenny Larsen with RespectAbility staff and Fellows in front of the RespectAbility banner

Lenny Larsen with RespectAbility staff and Fellows

Rockville, Maryland, May 4 – As a National Leadership Fellow, I have had the opportunity to hear from guest speakers throughout my semester with RespectAbility. One of our most recent guests, Lenny Larsen (an internationally recognized producer and director from Los Angeles), provided particular inspiration and advice for my life.

Larsen is a man of many talents. While serving as the executive producer/creative director for theme park projects throughout the world, he simultaneously was maintaining a second career as an internationally competitive springboard and platform diver with eyes focused on 2016 Olympic trials. Then the unthinkable happened. A trampolining accident resulted in a catastrophic spinal cord injury, rendering him paralyzed from the neck down and dependent on a ventilator to breathe. [continue reading…]

Eleanor Clift: Importance of Raising Awareness for the Disability Community

Eleanor Clift and RespectAbility's Spring 2018 Fellows

Eleanor Clift and RespectAbility’s Spring 2018 Fellows

Rockville, Maryland, April 18 – In a visit to RespectAbility’s office Eleanor Clift spoke to the National Leadership Fellows about the current administration, growing up during the Civil Rights Movement and race-related issues.

Clift is a well known columnist for The Daily Beast and an author; she was previously a reporter at Newsweek for 50 years of her life. She also has appeared in many movies and is a board member of RespectAbility. [continue reading…]

Dana Marlowe: Ensuring Online Accessibility For All

RespectAbility Board Member Dana Marlowe and RespectAbility Fellow Eric Ascher smiling in front of the RespectAbility banner

Dana Marlowe and RespectAbility Fellow Eric Ascher

Rockville, Maryland, April 12 – “Nine years ago this week.”

For Dana Marlowe and her staff at Accessibility Partners, those five words are cause for celebration. Over the past nine years, Accessibility Partners has advised clients big and small, in the government and in the private sector. The Kennedy Center, the U.S. Department of Labor, Amazon, Coca-Cola, Dell, Intel and LinkedIn all have turned to her team for advice on how to make their websites and software accessible to the one-in-five Americans with a disability. [continue reading…]

Geoffrey Melada: The power of storytelling to build your brand

Geoffrey Melada with RespectAbility Staff and Spring 2018 Fellows in front of the RespectAbility banner

Geoffrey Melada with RespectAbility staff and Fellows

Rockville, Maryland, April 10 – In his third time speaking to RespectAbility’s National Leadership Fellows, Geoffrey Melada, Director of Communications for Hillel International and a former journalist and trial lawyer, said the key to building a successful brand is storytelling.

The same goes for companies as for individuals. Melada told the Fellows that everyone in the room had something in common: being brand ambassadors for RespectAbility and our interest in disability inclusion. [continue reading…]

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